12.18.08

Treason-betrayal of country: a violation of the allegiance owed by somebody to his or her own country, e.g. by aiding an enemy.
- treachery: betrayal or disloyalty
- act of betrayal: an act of betrayal or disloyalty

Loyalty- state of being loyal: the quality or state of being loyal
- feeling of duty: a feeling of devotion, duty, or attachment to somebody or something

Honor- personal integrity: strong moral character or strength, and adherence to ethical principles
- respect: great respect and admiration
- dignity: personal dignity that sometimes leads to recognition and glory



confessions

definitions are nothing more than an accepted interpretation of a word and its oft used meaning in certain aspects and certain situations a word can have a flurry of different meanings than the ones widely accepted and in print Loyalty means so much more to me than this accepted definition. My own loyalty makes it difficult for me to post the things i wanted to post here it makes it hard for me to throw someone under a bus even when the deserve to be shoved and held while it rolls over them. people who know the confessor will tell you above all i remain loyal to those i love even when it is detrimental to myself. i am deeply conflicted by this factual statement about me. i dont want to harm myself or allow others to take advantage of me but i cant seem to say no its like im afraid that they will be upset and half of these people wouldnt be loyal to me if i needed them. i am working up the courage to lay my life down for who ever stumbles upon it and its going to be difficult for me but i am prepared.

lyrically speaking

Everyone has a theme song and this is mine it is Twiztid ft. Jamie Madrox and Monoxide Child
"Afraid Of Me"[Chorus x2]I'm so Hidden and you're never gonna see I'm cold Forgiven all because of my beliefs I'm no Body that you ever wanna be Cause I know that the world is afraid of me [Monoxide Child]Now you can try to sedate me, assassinate or just hate me But there's nothing that you can do to me lately Now I'm greatly accepted in the mind so I'm confused and intertwined From being rejected so many times, I wanna leave it all behind So kind of you to pick up the album and give it a try for once And run and tell your homies that these motherfuckers will die for us So many questions, fingers pointing for answers Suggesting that I'm the cancer that lingers inside the pasture With green grass up to my neck, and situations that's too fast To think about and most people can't dream about A hundred million miles and every single second And every time you hear this record I want you to feel me on every sentence Reminisce from descendants of past treasures We'll embark on a journey that'll stay alive forever Plus I would stand over on my side of the fence Regardless of the circumstances or the consequences [Chorus x2]I'm so Hidden and you're never gonna see I'm cold Forgiven all because of my beliefs I'm no Body that you ever wanna be Cause I know that the world is afraid of me [Jamie Madrox]I am my own worst enemy I'm not the smartest motherfucker and shit, I don't pretend to be And why I am the way I am is not a mystery My mind's not in proper working order or in therapy The brain's confused and mentally abused Life's been hanging on a string so what the fuck I got to loose? And what the fuck I got to prove to you? If you don't know me by now, you'll never know me You can put that on my real homies I got problems and they stack like bills And I relate to the broken, bleeding heart love killed And I awaited in the shadows, awake in the dark Hoping to talk to the passed on, I'm falling apart I'm such a mess and decisive, I'm fading away I'm out of touch with society and living today Never relying on my sanity, I threw it away To become the maniac that's got your attention today [Chorus x2]I'm so Hidden and you're never gonna see I'm cold Forgiven all because of my beliefs I'm no Body that you ever wanna be Cause I know that the world is afraid of me [Monoxide Child]Can you keep a secret? Well I'm afraid world because they want me to die, can you believe it? But I'm still alive... and been floating since '95 With my chin held high but I'm so dead inside Let the problems just roll and put them back into a pile Because it's just a bunch of shit that I can't deal with right now And I'm tired of always guessing and messing it up again And the next day it's even deeper and I'm steady sinking in [Jamie Madrox]I took a look at myself and came to grips with what I found It was a vision of a child, disturbed and broke down No soul, no heart because I gave it away No time for feeling sorry, I'll grieve another day And all those tears are stored in storm clouds That hover above me and cover the ugly Continued to haunt me when I was feeling low That's the same reason I hold on and never let go [Chorus x4]I'm so Hidden and you're never gonna see I'm cold Forgiven all because of my beliefs I'm no Body that you ever wanna be Cause I know that the world is afraid of me



The confession...
You did it to me now vengeance is mine are you worried?????
I am revolling in the fact that I know leaving a silly message on his girls myspace has him so in arms hes calling mine not trying to fuck her now but trying to stop me.
I told her i wont send the pics of his dick to his girlfriend but I probably am.
I owe this spineless fuck shit. Loyalty to me means not commiting treason by having phone sex with a man who has a girlfriend. I told her i am the most vindictive person she ever met and she knew better then sending me pictures of this dudes dick. Ill show her and then Ill send him a cc of the email, whats he gonna do cry like a fucking bitch, he already is.


The Confessor